Answering Machine Messages - 48 (Cell Phone) : Mom, Dad... Don't you think it would be easier to reach me if I had a cellular phone? So how about an early birthday pre...   Read Full Joke

Heavenly Voice Mail : Most of us have now learned to live with voice mail as a necessary part of our lives. Have you ever wondered what it wou...   Read Full Joke

Answering Machine Messages - 1 (Money) : Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If y...   Read Full Joke

Answering Machine Messages - 29 (Psychiatric) : Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent,...   Read Full Joke

Answering Machine Messages - 49 (Algebra) : Please leave your name and number -- But first, a short algebra quiz: How much is 5Q + 5Q? (Pause while caller thinks) 1...   Read Full Joke

Answering Machine Messages - 2 (No Sales) : Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot ...   Read Full Joke

Answering Machine Messages - 3 (Short) : Hi. Now you say something.

Answering Machine Messages (Wasting your time) : You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really nee...   Read Full Joke

Answering Machine Messages - 54 (Philosophy) : If a telephone rings in an empty room and no one is there to answer it, was there really a phone call? Help me investiga...   Read Full Joke

Answering Machine Messages #82 (Amnesia) : I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember. I'd appreciat...   Read Full Joke

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