Quotes By Woody Allen
I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-- Woody Allen
I am two with nature.
-- Woody Allen
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
-- Woody Allen
I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
-- Woody Allen
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.
-- Woody Allen
If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right.
-- Woody Allen
If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
-- Woody Allen
Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
-- Woody Allen
Collection of really funny jokes and famous quotes